Blah Blah Blah, The Truth No One Wants To Tell You, Thoughts

Things That Make You Realize You Are Too Old To Be Considered “Cool” Anymore

June 20, 2017

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You might have been wondering where I have been…

To put it bluntly I have been away aging in a hole.

During this lovely period I was enlightened to the fact that I am actually, legitimately too old to be considered “cool” anymore.

Here within are some of the reasons why.

Things That Make You Realize You Are Too Old To Be Considered Cool Anymore

  •  When you can’t wear those hipster-high-waisted used Levi’s everyone looks so sexy in because they wouldn’t look good on you… They’d look like Mom jeans with the addition of camel toe.
  • When you are wearing a ripped sweat shirt and a twenty-year old deadpan asks you if it’s Yeezy and it is 100% your brother’s old hand-me-down shirt.
  • When you honestly (hand on heart) as an educated woman can, literally, not figure out Snapchat. (I have tried for the record three different times on different days and just don’t get it.) (This may or may not have also included watching a YouTube tutorial and STILL not understanding.)
  • When all the hipster kids you see on Instagram are waiting for Kendrick Lamar at Coachella and you are Googling the New Order performance.
  • I still have never tried matcha.
  • I still don’t know how to pronounce acai.
  • I have never done a cleanse.
  • I eat toast on the regular.
  • Circling back, I don’t know one Kendrick Lamar or Frank Ocean song.
  • When my heart shattered into a thousand pieces because my DVD player on my antiquated computer broke and I can no longer make mix cds.
  • When I’m genuinely contemplating going to the Counting Crows/Rob Thomas concert-and am quite giddy about it.
  • I’ve never done Molly.
  • Oh yeah, speaking of, I’ve never been to Coachella.
  • One of the reasons I’ve never been there, is that I generally think it would tire me too much. I really like to sit and enjoy air-conditioning.
  • I still use my library card-almost daily.
  • Not to be redundant but I’ve never been to Burning Man (obviously).
  • On my Google history is a lengthy list of acronyms friends use on the regular that I don’t have a clue what they mean. For example, but not limited too:-IRL, GOAT, SMH, HAGN, IDK, DGMW, YMMD.
  • I still don’t know what woke means.
  • I still handwrite letters.
  • I do not have a tattoo.
  • I do not watch The Bachelor.
  • I don’t have eyelash extensions.
  • The thought of microblading my eyebrows terrifies me.
  • I don’t vape.
  • I’m petrified of the sun and will only go to the beach with an umbrella looking like a bee keeper.
  • I’ve never done Whole30.
  • I only have two Apps on my phone, one of which is still Shazam.
  • I shop for bras that are comfortable, not sexy.
  • Going to bed before midnight excites me.
  • Canceled plans also make me pretty happy.
  • I consider my old college t-shirts and tube socks suitable workout wear; not these mesh leggings and sports bras with five straps across your tits.
  • I don’t go to Equinox/Soul Cycle/Juvenda Yoga.
  • I like a white wine spritzer.
  • I still order the bread basket.
  • Happy Hour is my favorite time of day and the most appropriate time to drink before I get too sleepy.
  • I would gladly cancel any party plans to binge watch House of Cards and feel no remorse, only joy at watching Claire Underwood.
  • I’d like to be Claire Underwood.
  • Not leaving the house on a Saturday is considered winning.
  • Also, not getting dressed is a good day.
  • I still live for Sex and the City reruns.
  • Jake Ryan is still considered my “dream man.”
  • Farm stands get me high.
  • I miss the days when I used to buy my bikinis online at Victoria’s Secret. Not like now having to purchase in person to see which has the most ass coverage.
  • It might be time to start wearing one pieces. But, all the one pieces are too high-cut and show too much ass.
  • There really isn’t an appropriate type of swimwear for my body type evidently.
  • Who is A$AP Rocky and why does he spell his name like that and how do you pronounce it?
  • I can’t wear crop tops.
  • My last name isn’t Hadid

 

Soundtrack of My Life

Green Light Into Spring With Lorde

March 5, 2017

March is such a duplicitous demon of a month.  I always tend to get depressed in this not-quite-yet-spring-time of year.  Hopeful that it’s finally getting warm and then snow and cold weather comes to crush all my dreams.  It is only March 5, and yet I’m feeling all the feels of this month like nobodies biz.  It’s freezing, I’m grumpy and last year’s energy still hangs around me like a cold fog.

So what do you need?  A summer anthem.

Yes, a summer anthem in March.  I haven’t been this excited about a song or  music video in a long long time.  It’s called “Green Light” and is by the ever-talented wunderkind, Lorde.  The production by Jack Antonoff is nothing short of perfected genius.  With the chorus, the wild drums, the build-up….Everything about this groove gives me chills and makes me feel hopeful again.  Have a listen, get inspired….spring is right around the corner…

Movies

The Genius That Is-Tom Ford

February 9, 2017

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Tom Ford is undoubtedly a genius. This seems to be known to any woman or man whose crossed his clothing line in some capacity. If you live on the island of Manhattan, the look of Tom Ford might very well be the ultimate goal. Chicness to a level that I only wish I had one percent of. Do you think Tom would approve of my red Crocs?

I don’t think anyone would have the temerity to question that Tom Ford is one of the greats in the fashion world. Yet, I had no idea of his cinematic genius; until now.

I had seen A Single Man and quite enjoyed…but, that isn’t saying much. Put Colin Firth in a film and the minute I see those side burns and British bashfulness accompanied by his perfect elocution, I’m in love. However, it must be said, Nocturnal Animals is taking it to another level.

I watched this film days ago and it still haunts me. There is no garrulity in this movie, every shot, every scene is perfectly executed and tailored much like, dare I say it, a Tom Ford suit. The cinematography is so darkly wondrous it was as if each take was a perfectly-timed photograph. From one shot to the next, the way he interwove the story line, I can’t begin to imagine the story boards he must have created. And the acting! Oh what a tour de force from Amy Adams and Jake Gyllenhall. I don’t want to name shame here, but it is a wonder that La La Land with it’s cookie-cutter acting and heavy-footed dancing is so highly lauded and in the spotlight. Where to me, Nocturnal Animals is this year’s true triumph.

It is not an easy film to watch, as opposed, yet again, to the lightness of La La Land. There was one particular roadside scene which literally left, for lack of a better cliché, my heart pounding out of my body. Aaron Taylor-Johnson is such a perfect hillbilly backwoods villain that I completely forgot that he is British. His smacking lips and taunting of Gyllenhall’s weakness left me paralyzed with fear on the couch.

But, it should be said, it is not a straight grab you by the throat kind of thriller. Nocturnal Animals deeply explores psychological elements of relationships, regrets, life choices and who we choose to become in life which can ultimately haunt us the most of all.  

It is a darkly-beautiful, visually stimulating, exquisitely executed film. Much like the ingenious imagination and originality that is, Tom Ford.

Movies

Finding Strength In Hidden Figures

January 31, 2017

These are turbulent times indeed. Almost daily, I’m left super confused not only about my own life, but about the state of the world. Yet, there is so much to admire in the united forces of others standing up for their convictions. To say I have been moved by protesting against the powers that be would be a gross understatement.

This movie isn’t about a protest but it is about standing up for yourself and having courage on a daily basis. It’s one of those movies where I didn’t have any preconceived expectations about it. I started watching thinking, oh, if I don’t like it, I’ll turn it off. Pretty much the exact opposite of La La Land or Manchester By The Sea, which were oversold to me and for which I had too high of expectations.

Hidden Figures is a just a beautiful little film. Never does it wax on too strongly with sentiment or violence; yet, it gets its point across with subtle acting that is both believable and inspiring. It is the incredible true story of three brilliant African-American women working for NASA in the 1960s. Not only do these women cross gender and race lines, but the tenacity they had simply in their day-to-day left me awestruck.

Throughout the entire film I kept saying, “I can’t believe I didn’t know about this,” and “it’s not that long ago.”

The movie is fitting for our times. Times where we might feel lost against the majority or alone against those who have more authority than we do. Not only does it remind us to have belief in ourselves, but also what just a few can accomplish for the betterment of the world. If you are needing motivation or to have your spirit enlivened, I highly recommend Hidden Figures.

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Blah Blah Blah, Thoughts

How To Avoid Failed New Year’s Resolutions

January 17, 2017

I always feel a slight pressure with the new year. Like most 2016 had me walking around in a somnambulant state. The feeling of “bad luck” “things not working” tethered to me, weighing me down. Yet, I’ve rolled into 2017 not feeling particularly lighter. The miasma of last year still lingers around me I fear.

I’ve tried to kick off 2017 with a gusto. Did I mention I signed up for a twenty-one day yoga challenge? Today was indeed day nine! Unfortunately, I have yet to do day one due to a hectic schedule….but, the intention was there, right?

I’m just not sure how you kick past problems. Rid yourself of all that was lacking last year? Are there people who quite literally woke up January 1 and things just clicked? The clouds parted and there they were basking in the light and glory of all things fabulous 2017? Who are these people?

I didn’t do the typical setting up for failure by making new year’s resolutions. They always lead to disappointment after week three I feel. Yet, I did somewhat promise myself that I would have a better year.

But, here I sit and things oddly look and feel quite a lot like 2016. So what are you/we to do?

I read a great article the other day which said every new day is a chance to restart, to go from the beginning as if it’s a new year/new quarter/new whatever. I think this is a much better tactic then thinking all will change due to a new calendar year. Rather, if we make slight changes each day in a slow crawl to our ultimate goal, that seems more realistic and a better chance of a positive outcome to me.

So today, maybe I’ll try day nine, even though I haven’t done the first week and not beat myself up about it. Or maybe I’ll read a little longer tonight, eat a little healthier, write a little more. Any of the things I wanted to try do more of this year. Certainly, it will be a slow start and things won’t change overnight, but we have to start somewhere, right?

Just take it bird by bird….(read the book if you haven’t)!

 

Blah Blah Blah, Thoughts

2017-What Are You Doing?

January 9, 2017

So…it’s been a while. The holidays/end of year had me in silence. Yet, it is always a good thing to leave something you love, only to circle back in appreciation.

December was a dichotomously dreary month for moi. Some days I would say “that’s it, I am over everything and shall leave it all behind.” Mind you I had no real plan of what this meant, where I would go, or what I would be doing. But, the feeling behind the sentiment was an itchiness of things not working in life and the cowardly way one just simply wants to escape. On the other hand, I had some of the best conversations with friends old and new. Not garrulous exchanges, yet honest and raw, both fun and somewhat heavy. It made me never want to leave the nest and safety of my day-to-day life and the support group I have made that keeps growing.

So there I found myself torn between me, myself and I. Frankly, I still am. I have reached a point where I’ve told the universe that whatever you send my way shall be my path.

So what has it transmitted to me? As of right now crickets and chirpy birds. Danada, nothing. I am still waiting, hoping and that will be me for 2017 I think. Sanguine expectations and a patient student of life.

What are you waiting for in the New Year?

I’ll let you know how it goes for me:) (obviously.)

Patiently yours….

waiting

Blah Blah Blah, Thoughts

Holiday Survival Guide

December 2, 2016

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The holidays are a mixed bag. Some people seem to be blissfully happy, relishing in making ginger bread houses and purchasing their presents and gift wrapping in October. Then I have a handful of friends who completely lose their sh*t during the holidays. Their singledom turns them into weepy willows and they misplace their minds and sanity. I’m not sure if it’s the mistletoe, the punch bowl with no one to fill their cups. Whatever the occasion, they all seem to need constant supervision and be handled with kid fleeced-lined gloves.

I fall somewhere in the middle. I have a penchant for Christmas music, anything sung by Bublé or even Bing-King-of-White-Christmas-Crosby. Currently, I’m listening to choral music (Kings Choir Cambridge is my jam and I can’t get enough.)

I love the decorations and excuse to drink warm wine and sugary drinks. Yet, New Year’s Eve gives me serious acute anxiety.

“What will you be doing for New Years?” in Manhattan is a loaded question. Almost everyone answers with something fabulous.

“Going to St Barts, White Party Miami, just a quick ski trip in Gstaad,” everybody seems to answer.

Me?

Normally, I passively respond with a quick, “not sure yet,” knowing full well I’ll be at my parents’ house going to bed around 11 pm and praying to the gods that next year will be better then this one.

Wherever you fall in the holiday pendulum I’ve created a survival guide to help you get through the season. Here it is.

Holiday Survival Guide:

  1. Find yourself a punch bowl and fill it.  That’s correct, I’m encouraging you to go to T.J. Maxx and get a bowl like your crazy old aunt Sue would have. Big enough to fit a puppy in with a huge ladle and little glasses. Fill that bad boy up with a Martha recipe, or any recipe really. Even if it has 7Up or ginger ale, so long as there’s booze and a maraschino cherry that’ll do.
  2. Watch any movie with Hugh Grant. I know the obvious choice here would be Love Actually, but Four Weddings and A Funeral is cinematic greatness.
  3. Listen to Mariah Carey’s version of, “All I Want For Christmas,” each morning. There is no way any human could be in a bad mood.  This song is like Prozac for the ears.
  4. Bake. I get that a lot of my remedies revolve around food and drink, but you tell me if you are still in a bad mood with the smell of warm cinnamon wafting through your house.
  5. Go to a skating rink and watch people whiz by you. There is something antiquated and pure that skating brings to your subconscious mind.  It’s simple winter fun and will warm any stone-cold heart.
  6. Little Women. Find it. Watch it. Any version.
  7. Give gifts. I don’t care if it’s as small as bringing a damn candy cane to your best friend’s house. Giving is truly better then receiving and there is something joyous in watching any adult turn into their six-year old versions of themselves while they unwrap something.
  8. Purchase anything made out of spruce or evergreen. If you can’t do a tree buy a bow or a wreath. The smell of nature, forest and pine will trigger some sort of happy memory for your Scrooge self; I guarantee it.
  9. Wear sparkle. You know you’ve wanted to all year, now here is your excuse to dress as if your kindergarten self styled you. If you have rhinestones or satin on, nothing can stop you from being your best self.
  10. Buy yourself some bubbly. (Again, seems like I’m just trying to get you drunk but, you tell me the last time you were grumpy with a champers buzz.) December begs for something with fizz-albeit prosecco, cava, or of course champagne. Pop it. Celebrate it. Anything really.
  11. Flannel. Flannel everything-sheets, pjs, robe, blanket. I don’t care what it is just get it on and around your body.
  12. Gratitude. Find yourself some gratitude. Look at the people around you and be thankful. Even if you are turning into an old spinster with no one to join you under the mistletoe, at least you have good friends to whine about it with over no doubt; mulled wine.

bsinging

Dinner Party

The Best Peanut-Sesame Noodles The World Has Ever Tasted

November 16, 2016

In these trying times, one searches for comfort everywhere. Do we eat our feelings? Maybe.

These peanut-sesame noodles are super nourishing, slightly impressive and just all-around delicious. I thought a peanut sauce would be way harder, but this recipe is stupid-easy. Technically, you could make the peanut sauce in a blender, just whip it up. Yet, for some reason, I like to heat it on the stove and whisk until it gets super thick. Also, you have many options-you can serve cold, garnish with cilantro (definitely do this), add a squirt of lime (do this also), sprinkle with sesame seeds (yep, you guessed it- do this too.) Could also add scallions, but sometimes I find these too overbearing taste- wise.

I’ve only made this with spaghetti because that seems to be what we always have on hand in the house, but really any noodle variation would work-this sauce is super peanuty so could cover a piece of cardboard and make it nutty delicious (you get the idea.)

The Best Peanut-Sesame Noodles The World Has Ever Tasted

You Will Need:

  • Whatever noodle of choice (spaghetti or linguine works or you could do a rice noodle.)
  • ¼ cup peanut butter
  • 2 tsp. soy sauce
  • 1 tbsp. brown sugar
  • 1 tbsp. lemon juice
  • ¼ cup coconut milk
  • ¼ cup water
  • red chili flakes to taste
  • Optional garnish options that aren’t really optional because you should use them all-handful of cilantro, sprinkle of sesame seeds and a squirt of lime.

Boil your noodle of choice and drain, set aside.

In a pan over medium-low heat or in blender combine all ingredients; add water last. Blend or whisk until smooth. Toss noodles with peanut sauce until they are completely 100% coated. Can chill to serve cold or eat warm. I like to garnish with a squirt of lime, a handful of cilantro and sprinkle with sesame seeds and you should really follow my lead here.

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TV

Top Ten Reasons To Watch Netflix’s The Crown

November 7, 2016

 

img_1400Top Ten Reasons To Watch Netflix’s The Crown:

  1. Reportedly one of the most expensive tv shows ever made. Certainly the most expensive period piece ever; see what $125 million looks like on screen.
  2. Since it’s Netflix, you can binge watch all at once and not have to think about the anxiety-inducing election.
  3. Claire Foy, whom I loved since the Upstairs Downstairs reboot, as a coy Queen Elizabeth II. With her bright-poppy blue eyes, which flutter here and there, you’ll learn insight into the still reigning monarch (she really is quite obsessed with dogs and horses, but in some ways by no fault of her own.)
  4. It helps fill a missing Mad Men hole. Do you remember British Lane from Mad Men? Well, he’s here, played by Jared Harris, as King George VI and he is nothing short of remarkable. Both vulnerable whilst commanding, my heart broke as he sucked back his ciggies and inevitably quite literally hacked up a lung.
  5. See why John Lithgow will sweep awards season this year. I’ve always been a fan of Mr. Lithgow; yet, I had no idea of his true acting chops. I’ve watched many portrayals of Winston Churchill but none have struck me quite as much as John Lithgow’s. His hunched over wisdom and reenactments of some of history’s best speeches left me nothing short of spellbound. He is a true thespian and his portrayal of the incomparable Churchill is the best I’ve ever seen. I guarantee you too will be joining his fan club after you watch this.
  6. The sets, costumes and all that makes up the aforementioned $125 million budget do not disappoint. From the sweeping staircase at Buckingham Palace to a lush African bush filled with wildlife, no expense is spared in the lavish scenes and your senses truly rejoice. I swooned for all of Princess Margaret’s dresses and a particular moment with Prince Phillip and an elephant I still think about for some reason.
  7. You will learn something. Peter Morgan, the show’s creator and writer, focuses on key moments in history. Like the abdication of King Edward VIII, yet also sheds light on little things one wouldn’t know. I kept saying throughout watching, “I didn’t know that!” From big moment’s in history like a dense fog which caused thousands of deaths and years later led to an air-pollution reform bill (first I’ve heard of this.) To small nuances such as the switch board used to telephone the palace. You retain something from each episode no matter how big or small.
  8. It’s generally all-around some of the best acting I’ve seen on the small screen, or any screen really.  Every actor here carries their weight perfectly. Even Matt Smith whom I’ve never been particularly fond of is a floppy-kind of annoying-yet kind of likeable Prince Phillip.  Plus, if you’ve ever watched anything on the BBC you’ll see some of their all-time greatest MVP’s.  Like Eileen Atkins as Queen Mary and Victoria Hamilton as The Queen Mother. The entire series is really a who’s who of British acting royalty (no pun intended there.)
  9. It has something for everyone.   A little romance and secret love affair with Princess Margaret and Group Captain Peter Townsend for those looking to have their heart strings tugged. Yet, it’s not a slow period piece for the male gender or those easily bored. Each episode has a pace that would keep even the most testosterone-type or ADD viewer engaged.
  10. It’s just a really good show. In a time where the only thing found on the tube is The Kardashians or The Voice, The Crown reminds you what a really fantastic series can be. It harkens back to the time of Brideshead Revisited, where characters and plot count for something and acting-(imagine that!) actually watching some actors perfect their craft stirs you as a viewer. It is a triumph of a show giving humanity to an otherwise stiff-upper lipped British monarchy. It variously gives a heartbeat to a seemingly cold class and for us Americans something to warm to when our own political climate leaves us cold and uncertain.img_1403img_1402

    Netflix-The Crown

     

Soundtrack of My Life

Get Ready For Halloween Or Any Night Out With Italove

October 31, 2016

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I always think the most fun part of Halloween, or any big night, is getting ready.  Currently, I’m under the weather and living vicariously through everyone’s fun photos.  But, if I were to get ready for tonight’s festivities this is the song I’d listen to; “Emmanuelle”-from a band called, Italove.

Originally from Stockholm they are considered “Italo disco”, not normally my genre.  But, this song totally gets me in the grooving mood.  I hope you listen to it whilst putting on loads of glitter and have the best Halloween ever.

https://www.facebook.com/weareItalove/